Friend in Friend

Well I have to say that I am in a bit of an ugly place right now, a very fleshy place. I have taken to long a glimps at my circumstances and in the process lost sight of my Lord and now the waves are hitting me from all sides and I am finding it hard to keep my hopes up. I am still very functional and all but I just feel like BLAH. I am not fully plugged in to the power source at the moment, that’s for sure. It really is scary how when you take you eyes off our Lord and the mission for just a moment, allowing even a tinny whisper of doubt ,or even a lie to enter your thoughts, how very quickly it overtakes all you THOUGHTS and all you HOPES and all your DREAMS. Before you know it you forget the mission, your purpose , your place, and worst of all you are lost from the only source of light, Jesus.
So for now I will pursue my guide and my only source of light, allowing Him to mold me a little more along the way back to dry ground.
Here are some words of molding and shaping that He was working on me with this morning:

EPH 3:17-19
“so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge–that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.”

ISA 55:8-9
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,” declares the Lord. “As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

PS 40:5
“Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare.”

GAL 6:7
“Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.”

HOS 8:7
“”They sow the wind and reap the whirlwind.”

PROV 11:24-23
“One man gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.”

2 COR 9:6
“Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously.”

I usually find that the scriptures that I am led to in the morning don’t always make much since at the time but through out the day they serve a great purpose in my training and often have prepared me for what ever challenges I run into. God is so good , that will never change in my heart.
~C

Today was starting out so good, and then, I don’t know, I was just hit really hard with discouragement. I was just reading a good e-mail and with just a few words it hit me hard. Might have more to share later.
~c

1Cor 6:11
“”You were washed,…you were sanctified,…you were justified.”

Eph 5:25-27
” Christ….Loved the Church and gave Himself for Her, that he might sanctify and cleanse Her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present Her to Himself a glorious Church, not having a spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that She should be holy and with out blemish.”

God is doing this now so boldly in my Church. It has been such a beautiful thing to watch Him moving in and out of every place, bringing light in to every corner of every room. He is refining all that is good and of His will, and flushing out all that was not for His purpose and His goal for this mission with the washing of His word. So all that will be left is a beautiful bride ready to be wed on Her wedding day.

Above is a picture of a painting that I did the other day, it was a vision that God put on my heart for my church and what he is doing in all of our hearts as we prepare for the mission that we have been called to. If the picture doesn’t show up you can check it out on my web site.
Titled: “Washed”
chandabrown.tripod.com

Let the romance begin!

I am in the middle of an awesome book study right now with 5 amazing women, the book of study is “Captivating” BY: John and Staci Eldredge.I just finished chapter 7 (Romanced) it is about allowing yourself to be Romanced by God, going through different aspects of what that means. I so love this chapter, now if you had asked me 6 months ago to read this chapter I would have thought it was a silly idea, What, God romance you??? But through our last book study “Every Woman’s Battle” God very much revealed Himself to me in that very way as he gently held my hand through some really hard stuff. He pursued me and I Him, every day, for hours. At times it was like I could feel Him as if He was physically there right beside me. At that time the passion for my Lord was so strong that I was more in love with Him than my Josh(Never thought that was possible). I know it sounds crazy but that is TRUTH, and I now know that you can’t truly understand it unless you experience it.

Some where through the busyness of life I got lost, it was like I woke up one day and everything was gone, it seemed like it was over night but now I see that it was little by little that I began to step away. My wounded heart couldn’t take the risk of where my Lord was wanting to take me, I see now that slowly the fear of the unknown began to swallow me and I let it. My Lord was taking me through the chained door of my heart that has been hidden from even myself. This door was the thing that scared me the most, I have spent my entire life filling it, saving every heart brake and fear for another day. The very thought of what could be behind this door is what has kept me on the run, this is the only race that I was winning and loosing at the same time. Through an exercise that my loving sister FORCED me to do God really held up that mirror to my face and showed me what i had done, that once again I have let fear and mistrust that was birthed in my heart as a child destroy the way my heart was created to be, to be Romanced by my Lord.

This chapter really refreshed that experience to my heart again, it has created a warmth and an excitement at the thought of going there again. I have felt this amazing spiritual HIGH the past few days as we are reintroduced through a song, through a word, through the stillness of my children sleeping. Wow as I was writing this it felt as if We were dancing!

Let the romance BEGIN! Again

~C

A powerful exhortation to all who serve the Lord in some capacity or another…

(from Koinonia House)

TED HAGGARD AND THE IMPORTANCE OF ACCOUNTABILITY - (Print)

Ted Haggard admitted to “sexual immorality” this week - without going into detail - and has been removed from his position as president of the National Association of Evangelicals and as pastor of New Life Church in Colorado Springs. The news of his relationship with a homosexual male has shocked and deeply saddened the evangelical community in America, and - like David with Bathsheba - “hast given great occasion to the enemies of the LORD to blaspheme (2 Samuel 12:14).”
Haggard wrote a letter to his congregation, apologizing for his actions and accepting all responsibility for what he had done. He said,
…There is a part of my life that is so repulsive and dark that I have been warring against it all of my adult life. For extended periods of time, I would enjoy victory and rejoice in freedom. Then, from time to time, the dirt that I thought was gone would resurface, and I would find myself thinking thoughts and experiencing desires that were contrary to everything I believe and teach.
Through the years, I’ve sought assistance in a variety of ways, with none of them proving to be effective in me. Then, because of pride, I began deceiving those I love the most because I didn’t want to hurt or disappoint them.
The public person I was wasn’t a lie; it was just incomplete. When I stopped communicating about my problems, the darkness increased and finally dominated me. As a result, I did things that were contrary to everything I believe.
He did not make excuses. He did not say, “Oh, my behavior wasn’t so bad.” He recognized the depth of his sin and failure, and willingly agreed to step down from his positions of leadership.
Aside from his apology, however, Haggard said something in his letter that every church leader in the country, and indeed every Christian, should take note of. He said, “when I stopped communicating about my problems.” In other words, when he stopped being honest, when he stopped making sure he stayed accountable to somebody, that’s when he lost the fight and slid into the pit.
James 5:16 says, “Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.”
Ted Haggard was a major Christian leader in America, a public figure, and a spokesperson for the evangelical community. Not only did his position require great responsibility, it also required great protection. The Enemy of our souls knows how to exploit our weaknesses to his advantage, and we as Christians, and especially Christian leaders, must have people praying for and with us constantly in order to defeat the efforts of that Enemy.
Every single one of us has an area of vulnerability through which we can easily be tempted to sin. We may struggle with anger, or laziness, lust, or pride. We all have our Achilles heel, our thorn in the flesh that keeps us humble and aware of our need to totally depend on Christ. But, if we do not communicate with one another about the areas where we struggle the hardest, then we won’t get the prayer and assistance we need.
Christian leaders are not more holy and immune to temptation than the common Christian man or woman in the pew. This is a reminder that all of us need to pray for our pastors on a regular basis, and for any Christian leader in our lives. We need to keep careful watch of ourselves and make sure that we have trusted, mature Christian brothers or sisters (men should meet with men, women with women) with whom we regularly gather to share our struggles with temptation and the areas in which we need prayer. We need to pray with our spouses on a regular basis, and remain transparent. As the body of Christ, we must take care of one another - we need each other (1 Cor 12:12-27).
Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted. Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. - Gal 6:1-2
Wherefore lift up the hands which hang down, and the feeble knees; And make straight paths for your feet, lest that which is lame be turned out of the way; but let it rather be healed. Follow peace with all [men], and holiness, without which no man shall see the Lord: Looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; - Hebrews 12:12-15a
But exhort one another daily, while it is called To day; lest any of you be hardened through the deceitfulness of sin. - Hebrews 3:13
The news of Ted Haggard’s sin grieves the Christian community, but it also serves as an important reminder; Christ alone is holy, and only he gave us a perfect example. Christianity depends on faith in Jesus Christ, not in evangelical leaders. Christ is the solid rock on which we stand, and we can have confidence in Him alone.

Ok well I was talking with my amazing husband yesterday of how discouragement has been knocking at the doors of our hearts. Our heart is to serve, serve in our needy church , serve by doing what ever where ever. We have came to at least 3 or 4 people in church leadership with our heart and have been unheard, funny HUH. So of course we dance for a while with the lies of the enemy that it is a personal thing. In the depths of our heart we know the TRUTH, our place is not ready yet, there is NO rush with God, He takes His time because He wants it to be the perfect fit. So now we wait

Mean while we pursue our Love, our King , our Father, our Friend.

I was processing out loud yesterday with Josh and God really showed me something that is so important. We all have talents that God has given us, a talent being something that we could use out side of our God, for me it is drawing and painting, well anything artistic or crafty really. I noticed that when I dont use my talents I begin to feel depressed or not valued, I don’t know how to really explain it, I guess it is like a huge void or something. Then there are times that I have used my talents and felt excited and special BUT only for a while, but then become easly discouraged and fall away from it all together. Then there are other times where I was just flowing like all I could think about was the next painting that I was wanting to do. During those times I was painting and drawing visions daily, I was running out of supplies! WHY?? I thought, what was going on in my life that made me have such extreemly different experiences with my talent. Why at times was I so fragile with my tallent and other times I hid my tallent and other times nothing could stop me. AS I thought long and hard on this God said, “Where was I?”

When I was hiding my talent from the world I was hiding myself from my Lord, When i was here and there with my talent, I only had one toe in the water if it was to cold I was OUT! However when i was unstopable, High as a kite, and FULL was when I was in solid pursuit of MY LORD. It I guess is like God is the outlet and we are a plug, when we are unpluged we are cold, when we are halfway pluged the slightest bump could nkock us out all together. However when we are all the way pluged in we are solid and firm, we are ON.

But that’s not it God had more for me, Say I and a lamp in this whole plug analogy, No plug No light, half way pluged means you will have a flickering light very un predictible. However If you are all the way pluged in there is a stedy solid flow of electricty and the light will be BRIGHT. The light that flows out from the lamp is Only the reaction of a soild connection with the energy source! Wow I get it!!!!! My heart finaily Gets it!!! I have always foccused on my talent and it’s purpose when it was NEVER about my talent at all, it was all about God. My flowing of tallent is only the out pouring of my heart for my God. The paintings are Just the Fruit of something Far bigger and far more important. The scripture that we NEED to die to SELF to really LIVE really makes since now. I am so excited about this , it really takes alot of pressure off of me, I I have to do is focus and pursue GOD and He will take care of everything else. There is a scripture in 1 John 5 that says “He who has the Son has LIFE.” I don’t know if it can get any easer than that, How come it took me so long to really get it?

God you are so patient with me thank you!

~C

I found Something really cool on Halloween and christianity on CROSSWALK.COM. Should Christians celebrate Halloween? What does the bible say?? Check it out! ____________________________________

At HomeWord, we receive questions from time to time about Halloween. Should parents allow their kids to “celebrate” or not? To avoid “giving the devil his due,” so to speak, some Christians change the name of their festivities from a Halloween party to a “Harvest Party” (while pretty much everything looks exactly the same!). Churches throughout our country use Halloween as a means for outreach to the community. So what’s up with Halloween?
There is no doubt that Halloween’s origins can be traced to pagan beliefs and rituals. Satanic groups have also attached meaning to Halloween, celebrating it as a special holiday. These origins and meanings can be researched pretty easily on the Internet. Christians of good conscience differ on their views of whether or not believers should have any participation in Halloween celebrations. Certainly, Christians should not participate in the “dark side” of Halloween – to in any way approve of the satanic, or the focus on paganism, evil, death, etc.
Yet, the reality of Halloween participation for many - believers and unbelievers alike - is that of exercising a bit of fantasy, dressing up in costumes and having fun trick-or-treating around the neighborhood. To many, this is what Halloween is about, without any connection to occult or pagan practices. I have a hard time saying that there is anything wrong with this.
Let me give an illustration: We know the source and heritage of Christmas. We also know that for many people, Christmas is a very non-religious holiday. People give Christmas their own meaning, regardless of its origins. We would never say that everyone who celebrates Christmas is a follower of Christ or honors God. Halloween, I believe, is similar. People give Halloween their own meaning, regardless of its origins. Consequently, just because people participate in Halloween does not necessarily mean they are promoting or encouraging occult or pagan practices and beliefs.
Whatever conviction you hold about participating in Halloween, live it out for God’s glory! In all these things, a person should follow his or her own convictions, while understanding that Christians may differ in their beliefs about this issue. So, if you run into those fellow believers who differ from your stance on Halloween, give them freedom to live out their own convictions. The Apostle Paul said it this way, “Who are you to condemn God’s servants? They are responsible to the Lord, so let him tell them whether they are right or wrong. The Lord’s power will help them do as they should” (Romans 14:4, NLT).

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Fallow the convictions that God places on your heart is what I hear, and DON”T worry about others, YOU are responcible to God , It is all about loving on people not judging them We choose not to celebrate Halloween baised on the convictions on our heart, so are not sure what we are supose to do, guess we’ll just have to be creative, FUN!!!!
~C

I feel like I am High as a kite, last night Josh and I went to the meeting at the church. When we arrived there was 3 men that I had not seen before and Pastor Tim all sitting in the front of a croud of about 15-20 Ecclesians. I had no idea what to expect, like what we were going to be talking about, just that we were going to be doing a Q&A on all the possibilities for the future of Ecclesia (I was not in service). The me that were there were the Pastors and leadership of the Church Journey, On Sunday PT introduced the idea of merging with them. I’m not going to go into all the details of everything, there was just so much that was discussed. All that I can say is that God was VERY present in that room. There were many times where I found myself overwhelmed with JOY and HOPE that I had to fight back tears. It wasn’t really the things that were said , but it was God , I saw Him, I felt Him, I heard His voice through it all. He has told me for so long to just wait, be patient and that He WILL come for our church. Now I know that there will be more who will leave the church over this merge because it is a HUGE CHANGE, and well most people don’t like that, most people like to be comfortable and like things predictable, but really where is God in that??? His thoughts are not our thoughts and our way are not HIS. This will be a long hard road and I know that I will see PRIDE roar it’s ugliness all over the place because we are working with people after all and we think that we know EVERYTHING God blew me away last night that none of this is about ME, this , what God is doing now in this church is way beyond me and our church it is bigger than Nashville, bigger than this country. This is God’s work here and it surpasses ALL UNDERSTANDING. Nothing is personal, God will put who He wants where, we just need to be obedient and have HUGE faith now.
yesterday God spoke to my heart through His scriptures of what we are to do now.

Daily Light:
“You will not need to fight in this battle. Position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord.” (Chron 20:17)
“Let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not loose heart.” (Gal 6:9)
“But God has chosen the foolish things of the world to put to shame the wise, and God has chosen the weak things of the world to put to shame the things which are mighty; and the base things of the world and the things which are despised God has chosen, and the things which are not, to bring to nothing the things that are, that no flesh should glory in His presence.” (Cor 1:27-29)

O how God loves on me through my husband, He truly is my best friend. He knows EXACTLY how to rescue my heart from the edge of brokenness, the only thing that makes since is that it just has to be GOD! He made my husband a PERFECT fit to the puzzle that is my heart. I love Him with all the love I have.
~C

It has been a month now here at the Barnharts home, We have really enjoyed getting to know them, and they seriously are the sweetest family. However our hearts are aching for a place of our own, it is so hard for me to keep hope up right now. It just seems like nothing is ever going to happen, I think that last couple of days have been the hardest, I have just been getting overwhelmed. Right now I just feel like at any moment I am going to loose it and break down. Part of me is this weak, poor me, hopeless type and the other part of me is strong and full of HOPE and can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Part of me is so frustrated with the hopeless side , having no patients, yet the discouraged side is bearing most of the weight and is about to squash me. There is such a battle over my heart, the TRUTH says not to walk by sight but have FAITH in the unseen. The lies say that everything is going to fall apart and we will be forced to go back to apartments with our tails tucked between our legs. I believe in the TRUTH , yet the lies are at times very convincing. I know that God is fighting this one out hard for me, with every thought. Nearly everyday He slips me some words of HOPE.

Daily Light:
“Be sober, be vigilant;because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.” (1Pet 5:8)
“Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes.For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.
Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.” (Eph 6:11-16)
“Do not gloat over me, my enemy! Though I have fallen, I will rise. Though I sit in darkness, the Lord will be my light.” (Mic 7:8)

So today the battle goes on , I know with ALL my heart that my God is good, so I will hold tight to that to day so that I am sure not to forget.
~C